Bloodlines

Bloodlines.... Are they really that important?

Right now as I'm typing form my phone which is a scapegoat for my social awkwardness that I've tweeted about earlier today. I am at an awkward lunch with long long long long lost relatives from China. Like I've said no one has any idea how they found us. My father and his siblings take this situation as something of great importance. However I view this situation in a different light. I hardly know these people, never met then before until today, we are fluent in different languages. Worlds apart basically. With my deceased grandfather (15 years) is the only connection, hanging by a thread. If not for that, we would have not known the existence of each other and remain strangers. Maybe that's how the most people become strangers, lost connections after a generation has lost touch.

To me this lunch is nothing more than a formality, a recipe for awkward conversation and shy smiles. Which brings me back to the question, ARE BLOODLINES REALLY THAT IMPORTANT? I suppose if you're of royal blood, and it's necessary to fight for your butt on that throne. Then, the value of bloodlines would be extremely significant . However this won't apply for a otherwise common average girl like me.

My grandparents, like many other grandparents in Singapore, left their home town either in China or Malaysia to start a new life in Singapore. There must be a reason besides the part of money constrain that we aren't introduced to them during their life time. Everyone has their reasons for leaving their pass behind. Of course they would never talk of it, their past and secrets are taken to the grave with them. For all we know, this lunch might be a platform for them to dig out the past that my grandfather have left behind. The ugly past probably (I'm not being stereo typical or speculating anything). Obviously, this surreal "reunion" is qualified for novel material that it gives me a bad hunch.

Enough of me pouring my thoughts over here. Let's just say I've never been more glad that they speak Canto instead of Chinese. Canto is something that I can speak better in. Though if you think about it, it should have been Chinese that I'm better at, having had almost 10 years of 2nd language eduction in school. I guess nurturing starts at home. We spoke more canto than Chinese most of the time.

xoxo Shan

Dilemma stares back.

So getting myself off the internet for a substantial amount of time encourages my mind to wonder and go in to deep thought. Which got me thinking about how so many things have changed since the beginning of sec 1 until now. Also, over dinner today, my dad ask me what I had in mind for the future. I have given him no definite answer. The rough picture though is 1. do well for Os 2. Get into a good JC 3. Do wells for As 4. study in a university. As you can see, my life plan is pretty mediocre. But what really is there? Doesn't everyone(almost) go down the same path? I mean sure you'll find different things and meet different people along the way but we all end up at the similar destinations. A job. A permanent job that you will labour away at in order to pay the bills until you're old. The fact that I'm able to type out this list with ease shows how cliche the situation is. I wonder if my life would take a turn in view of being any different.

Anyway, all deep thoughts aside. Today started well  with a late 10am breakfast of an apple and a bowl of oats. Then math math math math math math. DINNER. math math math math. yeah... great day. It is 22 hours++ to the 10 week count down to prelim once it strikes midnight tomorrow. All right this is the last time that I'm going to type about this so bear with me this last time. The reality of the situation scares me. It's a rather bittersweet situation. On one hand I would love time to pass more slowly so I'll have more time to study but on the other hand I'll like Os to be over as soon as possible. ASAP(?). I''ll miss some people that are close to my heart and wouldn't want to leave them so soon however I'll like to get out of the class full of MOST people that I can't stand. Dilemma, dilemma.  

Oh yes and I just finished a pot of tea while reflective me was being reflective.

Here is the moon after dinner at 8. It's a long day today, the sun did not set until the clock struck 7.45pm. Unusual.

Also at the place where we ate our dinner I spotted a sign that read "THANK YOU FOR NO SMOKING HERE" I think 'O' is rather lonely without a 'T'

A cup of tea is a reflective soul's great companion. 

YES.

There is church tomorrow/today. After that a lunch with some long long long long long long long lost relatives that are visiting from China. How on earth they found us still remains a mystery. I've never met them in my life so I hope tomorrow's lunch ends well. 

xoxo Shan

Life in a cave

Since I'm using the Internet right now, why not write a post:) sorry, I've got no pictures today:(

Today, I have supposedly planned to meet Bianca at the library this morning but last night/1am in the morning, my piano teacher sent me a text message and stating that lesson should be changed to 12pm-3pm because it's PIANO INTENSIVE, I was looking forward to studying at the library and I had piano lessons. but honestly I should stop moaning, if I had my lesson at 5 I would end at 8 which is way past dinner time... Hey don't judge me, food is antidote to the sadness in my soul:)

Typing this post from my phone, I think this is going to occur more often since I'm preparing my brain for : "study more, play less" mode by using the Internet only at certain times of the day for example right before bed. Which is driving me nuts. The whole day when I was in the car or trying to finish my work I'll reach for my phone consistently and then my hand flinches and my mind chants "SELF CONTROL SELF CONTROL!!!!" it's been 30 flinches today got to reduce them. 30. That is A-L-O-T. I was never conscious of this bad habit. Lmao flinches. Like flinchel. Rachel and Finn from glee. Get it get it??? All right clearly living in a cave isn't working very well.

Also, my mum got hooked on to this bad habit of watching crappy tv show while ironing clothes, she watches desperate house wives, the bachelorette, and others which I can't recall.

I guess bad habits begin with poor self control. Does this mean my mum has a secret desire for crappy shows? Let's hope that doesn't run in the family.

Sigh prelim is in 10 weeks staring Monday. Come at me prelims, I'm going to complete this trial race with confidence and overwhelming success.
PERSEVERANCE AND MENTAL STRENGTH. SELF CONTROL. Oh god I'm starting to sound like some overachiever junkie. I'll stop right here to save your eyes from reading anymore of my slow morf of my personality into a pre exam mugger

xoxo Shan

Stash away

Hello, just though I write a post to say hi as well as to say MY MUM HAD A DRAWER OF CHOCOLATE STASHED AWAY. As you might have already guessed, I took a bar of Cadbury...

I got my knee brace today, which means that I can jog, really slowly.

Here is the picture of the luminous green sunglasses, I come to the conclusion that the colour is neon green. A colour so bright that my phone camera just shows me white screen every time I try to change the point of focus.

The weather is so hot I bet the road is hit enough to cook an egg. But that would be inedible but it's something on my bucket list

PS if the picture is too large, I can't help it, I'm blogging from my phone because I'm too lazy to transfer the picture from my phone into the laptop.

                                   
                                                               xoxo Shan

I need shoes that squeak

Do you call them squeak shoes? The ones that the little kids wear so their parents can find them between clothes rags? Well I got lost in ion orchard and then in Ngee Ann City... I'm pretty proud of it, it means that I don't spend much time in town... Dayum, self comforting is the worst.

Why did they have to block the crossing of roads and force every one to navigate through one of the most complicated underground link way? Gheee I was practically lost in a jungle of stores that sold over priced bags and clothes in ion. On this occasion, I was forced to ask a receptionist one of the most embarrassing question in the world "How do I get out of this mall?" What a milestone in my life.

Also ion orchard has one of the fanciest public Restroom I've ever seen. 

Then I was lost again in Ngee Ann City where Beckie and Miss lum found me. Saved. 

I'm so full right now, I don't think I can even eat dinner later. Oh and that picture is a boiling pot of grime. I spent most of my time in Seoul attending to Beckie's burning food. I'm such a mom.... Jia Yan and I carried out our yearly ritual of frying ice cream on a oily hot plate. 

*Sigh* It's the last Seoul Garden that we'll be having:( The Netballers are great company, I'm going to miss them. They bring so much joy into my life. The type of joy that I don't feel very often because well, my class isn't all that exciting... it's a undeniable fact. 

On the way back I was stopped by a tourism board personal where she asked me "Are you local?" before I could construct a reply, she handed me a Singapore promotional card. I didn't say anything. I simply nodded politely before accepting the card graciously. I LOOK SINGAPOREAN RIGHT? 

This ISN'T a good thing that I was mistaken for a tourist....

I also heard drilling coming from beneath this ground, I'm pretty sure I wasn't delusional, my conscience is clear.

THERE WAS A RUBI SALE. SALEEEE. I bought a pair of luminous green sunglasses for $2. GREAT DEAL. The original price was $14++ :)

 I found a present for Bionc!!! YAY. The urge to buy it was almost immediate. The moment the item caught my eye, it screamed "BIANCA'S BIRTHDAY PRESENT!!"

Now I know what you're thinking when you look at that picture: "IS SHANNON A CLOSET PEDOPHILE?"

NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT. I had no intension of taking that man's butt or anyone's legs but in order to avoid posting anyone's anonymous face, it was necessary. My intension is to emphasize is that this is the first time I've boarded a train with no seats. It was a empty carriage. What is this voodoo? 

I met Yi Ching on this particular train. It was a awkward "Hello" before I got off the train hastily.   

Bye, time to get some work done. It was a eventful day:) OHHH this food baby is killing me.

 Mental note- all you can eat buffets are enticing but they have the worst after effect.

xoxo Shan.

Suntan my beddings

So, I woke up at 12pm today in sight that I would not be able to sleep in for the days that follow because I arranged things in the morning to get myself out of bed. Not that that's the best strategy but it works.. :) Though I've decided before hand to wake up later. No late, I woke up groaning as HALF THE DAY WAS ALMOST GONEEE but none the less I managed to smack some of those polished black and white keys.

While trying to keep in sync with the Grade 7 CD spinning in the Bose player 

And later to the metronome. Where I found out that the recorded ABRSM CD was terribly off beat, or maybe my metronome was just old and slow 

In between songs that I've practiced, I paused to feel jealous of my beddings busking in the wonderful sunlight.... 

Then back to the scores again

 

Before my stomach started to rumble so loudly that at one point where the music was suppose to be terribly soft, the growling over powered it. Which meant it was time for lunch. 

Everyone hates doing the dishes right? Isn't that why dishwashers were invented? 

The whole time I was loading my dishes, the song by Hank from Vlogbrothers kept playing in my head. "OHHHH this is how you load a dish washer, this is how you load a dish washerrrr.."(and so on)

you can listen to that song in that video below:)

                                         

For once, I was comforted by the fact that my laziness was not of much harm to Mother Earth because  a dish washer saves both water and electricity.

xoxo Shan 

   

King of the household

Today is Father's day so happy Father's day Dad. Love you Dad:)

I dug out photos from the photo box today, filled with childhood memories and shelved dreams.

I wonder why growing up meant curbing your imagination, I guess it's because of Society's pressure to conform.

We celebrated Father's day by going to a Chinese restaurant that we've never been to before. I've never seen tea served in a glass before. The color of the tea made me feel like I was all grown up drinking whisky in the wrong type of glass, not that I would want to have any. I prefer to let my Kidney experience natural death due to old age...

I would press this button of the lift everyday but I'll have never stopped to observe the brail on it until I bumped into a blind man today. He felt for the button quickly and made it to the right floor. When he exit the lift, I extended my flabby arms and tried to feel these metal dots but every button felt the same. I'll have to give it the blind man this time. He does have some sort of enhance sense of touch. Quite a talent.

P.S. I replied a text ar 8.30am even though I was suppose to awake at 9. HAHAHAHA

 *Achievement unlocked*

P.S.S. Alright as you can tell from my relatively dead tone of excitement, I'm tired, Tired from an hour at the gym trying to train my non-existance abs. *Fingers crossed* they'll surface soon:O

P.S.S.S. Got to study, tomorrow marks the beginning of the last week of the holidays:( 

P.S.S.S.S. I have forgotten to catch the sunset today.... :"(

xoxo Shan

It's a fruit

  Today was a strange day. My Math tuition teacher called in sick (well technically she texted me so... texted in sick? nah doesn't sound right) which meant I could sleep in. She texted me at 7.45 am so naturally when I was awaken by the deafening text message bell, I felt around for my phone and caught a glimpse of "I CAN'T COME TODAY, I HAVE A BAD COLD" and went back to sleep without returning a reply. BUT BUTTT she tuned up at my door step to check if I got the message while I was asleep, because she was a afraid I was waiting for her... she's so nice:") however I feel extremely bad... moral of the story, reply your text messages kids, even if opening your eyes burns that early in the morning.. yup.

Later that day, I practiced the piano before going on an expedition to look for a out of publication textbook in brass brasa. (how do you actually spell brasa?)  before we passed a MANGO sale in bugis where my mum went slightly insane and was in a particularly great mood. She told me I could pick out two items of clothing, but all I could find, that was suitable, was one. ONE, that suited me. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME. The carrot was dangling in front of my face (metaphorically) and I chose ONE item of clothing. Sigh* anyway, here is a picture of it. 

I'm going to do some math homework. I need to. Maybe I need to cherish these student moments more. My cousin who has recently became a lawyer constantly reminds me of how much she misses studying. I don't know, adults seems to get more sleep than we do on regular school days, unless they party and get terribly hangover, but that's besides the point...

Nite world

xoxo Shan

light play

The day started off with tuition. Tuition is the only reason I'll get my ass out of bed that early during a school holiday. Anyway, the sun is setting right now and here are some pictures:)

Here are my feet on fake grass. The wooden boards were hot. Also my mum has a talent for hiding the outdoor slippers. Thus explaining why I need to stand on this slab of fake grass

The dust on the camera lens made little colour circles when the sun rays hit them.

THE EMPTY-NESS OF MY ROOM IS KILLING ME :"(

What colour should I paint my wall? 

Oh this is fun making the circle pictures progressively bigger. If Debbie were here, she would shout "LAME",  in fact I can hear it in my head right now.

PS. MUM SAID I'LL BE STOPPING CHINESE TUITION FOR NOW. CELEBRATE OH CELEBRATEEEEE!!!

xoxo Shan

We play from our souls

Today is the third week of the holiday... Sight they are passing ever so Quickly.

Also Bianca crashed my house today were we recorded something and also studied. Yes we really did. 

                                Failed editing attempt. There was too much sunlight in my room

                              Also Bianca learnt the chord C, therefore she did some soulful singing

        Before she proceeded to singing a song about the menstrual cycle. WHO DOES THAT?!?

I was playing the guitar

 While studying Biology, Bianca insisted that a head could fit into blenders and get crushed... ewww. Now, every time I set foot into the kitchen, I can feel the blender staring at me, awaiting my death by grinding. 

Here is a circle photo(edited by Bianca). BYEEE

xoxo Shan

Greetings

Hello world.

Me and Shan have just recorded a cover.

Hope you like it. 

It will be up soon.

Lots of love,

Bianca and Shan

(The coolest kids ever) 

(Well bianca is) 

(Don't know about Shannon!) 

BYE

wherefor art thou chocolate?

Today's weather was surprising pleasant. The whole afternoon, the sky looked like it was going to pour but it didn't, which meant that I brought my umbrella out to physio for nothing after my mum's much nagging... THE SKY IS PLAYING TRICKS ON ME...

After physio, I decided to get myself some chocolate. I bought it form a cheers located in a MRT station. Which is odd. Why would cheers be in a MRT station when the Singapore law forbids the eating of foods and also drinking in train stations. I had to carry the bar of chocolate the whole ride home, which was in all honesty torturing.

Upon reaching home, I saw swimmers in the pool. I was tempted to jump in I swear. However, all I could do was dip my feet in the pool. It was pleasant and refreshing.. for my feet. 

Also, when I was passing my mother a pair of scissor this morning, A thought passed my mind 

So I drew this. It's plossible... 

The ways of the universe puzzle me.

PS. I am aware the wherefor art though means : Why are you. so my title means why are you chocolate... now that I think about it, it doesn't make much sense 

xoxo Shan

YOU'RE SO BRIGHT GIRLLL

It's 35 degrees celsius out side. I WAS SWELTERED IN CLOTHES. It's on of those days where you feel like shooting down the sun. That is impossible though when it's a huge fire ball, 100 times the size of earth. 

By mid day, I've decided to make the best out of this insane weather and capture the 'all you can absorb sun rays', like a 'all you can eat buffet', just... that it's free. 

Not that horrible considering it was taken with an iphone that has a crappy camera. (I am aware that crappy is not a word)

The best part about a hot day, as I've observed lately, is that the sun sets are mesmerizing. Also for once, I didn't mind my iphone camera malfunctioning because it captured lights as magnified circles. 

P.S sorry for the tiny photos, the quality is horrible and visually unpleasant, to me. BLAME STEVE JOBS... hold on, I take that back. Don't do that... no one should disturb the dead, they might rise up as zombies and attack you. RARR. This is an extremely long P.S. my apologies.

Night world. I need my beauty sleep. 

xoxo Shan

LIFE SUPPORT

Saturday mornings are the most wonderful time of the week, unless it pours. Don't get me wrong, I love the rain. But the sky crying on a Saturday morning would mean sleeping in. This makes me feel extremely lethargic. Honestly the worse feeling ever. That Saturday would have been wasted. 

Let's get back to why I'm blogging today. Books. I finally got my lazy ass to the library and borrowed some books. Short stories mostly. I dream of the day that I could do a book haul, but I do not buy books. Again you know why. 

I have realized that for me, a day that goes by without reading is like forgoing water for a day. I've NEVER tried for going drinking water for a day.. I presume that it would hurt terribly and I would also have an increased in body temperature. A rather accurate hypothesis?

My dad got me this neckless early this year and I've finally got around wearing it. The intricate 'carvings' is one of the main reason why I've decided to wear it. Hey, I'm a girl. We're naturally attracted to shiny/complicated things. Maybe that's why a saying goes; " DIAMONDS ARE WOMAN'S BEST FRIEND" though if you think about it, why would anyone want a non living best friend who uses you as a platform to show case it's/his/her own beauty... 

Alright. I'm going to complete my homework in view of a possible photo shoot next week. "Work before play"says my mom. Her words haunt me even in my sleep. 

xoxo Shan. 

Things grow on trees

This afternoon I was painting my nails outdoor. It was quiet at home and my only 'company' was  my artificial potted plants. I was using my right to fiddle with the fake plants, while waiting for the nail polish on my left hand to dry. Also I was saddened my the fact that I didn't have more vibrant looking nail polish. Partly due to the fact that I spend most of my money on candy anyways. My point is.. WHAT IF MONEY NAIL POLISH GREW ON TREES?

Impossible huh? Also my IKEA furniture was delivered today:)  BUT THE BED FRAME WAS CHIPPED. *anticlimax* I was eagerly awaiting my new bed frame all day. Sometimes I wonder what the universe has against me. Maybe it's because I contribute to global warming by purchasing artificial plants(it's made of plastic I might add). However, I'm going to defend myself right now. REAL plants wither and die when the live with me. Oh and school's out for two weeks. I can finally sleep in. Wonderful!! 

xoxo Shan. 

Let's start a fresh.

  Hello internet world out there. This probably isn't the best idea but I'm going to start blogging. Blogging my average life and occasional adventures. ps. my blog may contain numerous spelling mistakes. It's dyslexia I swear. I thought the world should know of my wrongly wired head brain. 

mean while, here's my experimental circle. Looks more like an oval to me but meh, I'll get better with time. (fingers crossed). Mean while, I have a 'rehearsal battle' to prepare and that is my prelim examinations. Starting today, it's a 11 week count down.  Wish me luck.

xoxo Shan.